News for those living under a rock: if you’re an expectant father, it might not be an amazing idea to be smoking around your pregnant wife.

A “new” study by University of Nottingham researchers showed that – now get this – secondhand smoke increased the risk of stillbirth. Allow 8BitDad to be the one to say – this is breaking news! Breathing smoke – that is, carbon-filled air – is bad for the vulnerable and tender being that is growing inside of a pregnant woman!

This study, of course, is slated for April to show up in everyone’s favorite journal: Pediatrics.

Jo Leonardi-Bee, the study’s author, in typical scientist form, then reneged on their whole point, mentioning that they’re not sure whether the father’s smoking is effecting his sperm directly or if the negative effects are coming from the mother breathing in the smoke…and of course, more research needs to be done, wink wink, nod nod. Way to secure your next gig, Jo.

Also – and this might be the official takeaway – if you do intend on smoking while your wife is pregnant, remember that for whatever reason, we only recently started talking about “third-hand smoke,” which smokers think is just a way for the squares to take away their fun. Third-hand smoke is the lingering molecules of second-hand smoke that have stuck on your surroundings – and even your clothes. 8BitDad isn’t going to tell you how to live, but we’re going to tell you how not to live. Screwing up an unborn baby ain’t no way to live, sucka.

Single dudes are still allowed to smoke, but it’d be a nice gesture for them to not light up while they’re near the baby oven, or to give pregnant babes deep hugs after smoking in their heavy-knit sweaters.

Sauce: Time