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Sleep Tight: Do You Lock the Nursery Door?
9 years ago

Sleep Tight: Do You Lock the Nursery Door?

When a kid is in the crib phase, they accept their fate for good amount of time; my son was generally happy to be in his crib, but we saw a look in his eyes that said, in the plain english that he was not yet able to speak, “dudes, you realize that I’m out of this motherf***ker the second my leg is long enough to swing up here, right? Once I get out of here, I own the place. I will help myself to food. I will turn on the television and order OnDemand porn. I will log onto this apartment complex’s website and take you off the lease. I will set the couch on fire, and I will crap in a drawer, somewhere, and you won’t find it until it’s too late. BTW, thanks for giving me milk every day. It’s great for my growing bones.”

I don’t know where my son learned to curse, but I’m assuming it came from me. Also, I couldn’t punish him for it since he said it with his eyes, not his mouth.

What can a parent do to keep their kid in bed once the crib front comes off? There are as many opinions as parents, and it seems like every father’s got a solution that’s worked for them and not someone else. After the jump, 8BitDad lets you know what other fathers (and a couple of mothers) have done.

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