wtf keith

Back in 2011, we introduced you to sweetheart, Keith MacDonald, a British dude that’s got 11 kids with 10 women. For the record, he says only eight of the kids are his. And as for the others, he’d worn protection.

Sounds legit.

But the big news today is that 28 year old butthole Keith MacDonald got out of an immediate jail sentence for kicking and punching his girlfriend, Clare Bryant and hitting their daughter in the head with the refrigerator door.

Now, this story’s not without some he-said-she-said, but really, everything I’ve read about MacDonald in the past points to him being the worst kind of father, and abuse is not foreign to him.

MacDonald had pleaded guilty to avoid jail, yet the court magistrates were soft on him; MacDonald said that he needed to get his life back on track and needed help to do so.

Outside the court, however, MacDonald gave this statement: “I pleaded guilty to get out of jail. If I plead guilty, I won’t go. I didn’t do it – I didn’t touch her. I’m happy about not going to jail. It gives me a chance to get my life back on track.” Magistrates suspended his jail sentence of 20 weeks in jail for two years.

If this guy stays out of trouble and reforms his life, I’ll sprout wings and fly my happy ass to England myself to congratulate him.

According to the story that the court heard, MacDonald showed up at Bryant’s house to drop off some money and ask for his sunglasses. Bryant first told him to go away, but as she turned to get the sunglasses, MacDonald pushed her, grabbed her hair, kicked and punched her. He then threw the refrigerator door open, which hit their daughter in the head. There was no mention that Bryant was violent with MacDonald in the incident.

MacDonald and Bryant, who have two children together…

WAIT WAIT WAIT. Two, did you hear me? These numbskulls have two children together. This is going to make you even more mad in a second…

So, these stupid British taints met – bear with us, this is sweet – at a bus stop. MacDonald was drunk at the time. Bryant became the eighth woman impregnated by MacDonald, who first became a father at 15. Who falls in love with this guy enough to have two kids?! Okay, one kid, fine. Mistakes happen and maybe she didn’t know about the other SEVEN KIDS at the time. But after seeing what kind of dude this guy is, she had another with him?!

Okay, that’s it. I’m done. There’s nothing more that can logically be said here.

Blah, blah, blah, check out the Daily Mail article linked below for more details about this stupid story.