AthleTitti: You Are the Jungle Gym
This ROFLWTF moment is brought to you by Atsushi Shiraishi at the Tama Art University. When you’re a father, you want to be your child’s everything, and what better way to do that than by being your child’s EVERY-F***ING-THING?
That’s why the AthleTitti makes so much sense, even if you can’t say the name without giggling to yourself like a schoolboy. This rope, leather and steel vest provides your child with hand-and-footholds to rival even the finest play equipment at the park. Just know: you will get kicked in the johnson.
“Father itself integrated with the athletic play equipment is minimal in physical addition valuable time childhood has become possible to share a child,” says the probably inaccurate Google Translated version of the AthleTitti site.
Yeah, so that’s that.
And I’m not judging, but if you don’t have a child, the AthleTitti might be kind of cool for a night of exploration with your partner. And that night might even yield a child, in which case you can put this vest away for a couple of years (maybe clean it first) and then use it as it was intended, you sick butthole.