Back when it was a totally dope diss to say “don’t have a cow, man”, kids had a vocabulary full of pop culture. There was something magical about old video games’ vocal snippets. Because games had limited memory, and because we were dealing with cartridges and CDs instead of giant hard drive installs, sound bytes were short, succinct and hilarious.
My friends and I would dole out disses and exclamations based on video game sound bites. I wonder how many of these were common among your group of friends too! The best thing is that I’ve found that some old school video game phrases are totally still usable now that I’m a father…
Game: NBA Jam (1993)
System: Arcade, Genesis, Game Gear, SEGA CD, SNES, Game Boy
Usage: After jamming home some trash next to your unaware child.
Of course. NBA Jam was a game full of sound bites and quotables. And while “he’s on fire” was commonly thrown around by my friends, the more forceful exclamation was a gentle “BOOMSHAKALAKA” yelled into the ear of a friend who merely had the bad luck of standing next to a trash can while you had something to throw out. You’d throw down the trash so authoritatively that let’s face it, you should have looked into a career as a garbage man. Well, now you’re a parent, so part of your job is being a garbage man, so the next time you need to throw something out, do it with style and scream “BOOMSHAKALAKA!” Your kid will repeat it in no time.
Have you ever noticed that moms and dads speak differently to their babies? Moms tend to engage in “baby talk”, while fathers’ words tend to sound a lot more like the kind of conversation they’d have with an older child. Or, say…their accountant.
“This isn’t a bad thing at all — it’s not a failing of the fathers”, according to study lead Mark VanDam, a professor in the Speech and Hearing Sciences department at Washington State. “We think that maybe fathers are doing things that are conducive to their children’s learning but in a different way. The parents are complementary to their children’s language learning.”
Let me be frank with you: dads are doing cute shit and you should point at them and squeal “D’AWWWWW”. And because some of you haven’t dipped your skulls into the pantheon of cute, nerdy, loving, involved dads out there, I’m here to recommend some.
You will follow them. You will enjoy them. You will like some of their photos. These tasks will cost you nothing out of pocket, but will make their day.
In case you don’t have your ear to the streets, (and why would you, it’s filthy) you might not know about a new trend: the “dad bod”.
In short, the dad bod is the body your dad’s got. you go check him out and tell him we said hello while you’re out. Don’t worry, we’ll wait.
You back? Okay cool. So the dad bod, as you saw, means you’re not cut anymore. You do some sit-ups and maybe run a little, but your youthful definition is gone. It’s cool, man. The ladies are into it. It’s socially acceptable. It’s in GQ, for crying out loud.
Hey, up front: this is a sponsored post. Though we’re going to talk about some typical 8BitDad dad commercial stuff, I’m letting you know that I was compensated by the Swiffer folks with money and product to talk about their #SwifferDad campaign. Opinions, as always, are all mine.
You know the Swiffer commercials: a green box shows up on someone’s front porch, and suddenly the family enjoys cleaning. But what you might not have noticed is that Swiffer commercials have been really kind to fathers.
With the new “Swiffer Dad” campaign (HASHTAG!), P&G really put their money behind dads, even enlisting some dad bloggers for their commercials. Seem legit, right?