“His version of eating healthy was the lettuce on the Whopper Jr.”
And that’s why Linda Phiel bought her father one last Whopper Jr. from Burger King. At. His. Funeral.
I turned my back on him for an instant and he was gone. I didn’t hear a sound. Except the other customers at REI. But I knew where he’d go. It’s not hard to plot a 2 year old’s path through a camping gear store. When he wasn’t in the tent, I found him playing in the hanging forest of sleeping bags. We looked for boats, climbed on the boot testing rock; and stopped when Ray, who was working in shoes, said to stop. Then checked out and headed to dinner.
I was thinking pizza. Kids will eat pizza because it’s just hand-held spaghetti. But the freeway exit closest to Blind Onion Pizza was closed. I decided to try an unknown quantity: In-N-Out Burger. Unknown because he hasn’t ever really gotten into cheeseburgers. He likes cheese, and sandwiches and meatballs, so I called a cheeseburger a “meatball cheese sandwich” to improve the likelihood he’d eat it. It was still a risk. Dude night could be fight night…