Summer Infant has a tough job. They make great audio and video infant monitors – unfortunately, they can’t control their consumers’ intelligence. That’s why Summer Infant is “recalling” their baby monitors. Oh, it’s not a recall in that they’re taking them back – they’re just recalling a simpler time when parents were more responsible with their childrens’ lives.

SEVEN whole kids have died since 2004 as a consequence from strangulation on the baby monitor’s power cord. Turns out parents don’t think that their children will be able to tug on the cord and wrap it around their necks. Toddlers are never known to tug on anything they can get their hands on, so this is a surprise to everyone.

This really isn’t even news. That’s why Summer Infant is committed to letting you know you’re a moron. “In addition to warnings already included within our baby monitor products,” Summer’s website says, “we are also providing a Safe Installation Guide…and a warning label free of charge to anyone who does not currently have one.” Dude, they even said you ALREADY got warning labels with your product. This is the equivalent of your wife saying “even though the phone is right next to you and ringing, I’ll walk across the room and pick it up myself. Don’t move an inch.” Consider yourself dissed by Summer Infant.

In a related story, Mother Nature is recalling baby hands because they clearly are touching too many things in their parents’ houses. So if you’ve got any baby hands around your home, gather them up and send them back to Mother Nature.