purity balls

We read a story about “purity balls” back in February of 2011, and it was totally fun. But FYI, it’s totally not a dead issue. Religion Dispatches (dot org!) totally brought up these balls up again, and we were like “we like balls, so count us in.”

Religion Dispatches‘ Jessica Valenti is a feminist (that’s our favorite flavor!), so she’s auto-against purity balls. But she thought she was overreacting, so she showed the trailer of the movie Virgin Tales to her dad. Her dad was ” visibly upset for some time afterwards.” That’s when we watched the trailer, and oh my!

It’s not that the idea of a father caring for his daughter’s sexual – ahem – pickiness is weird. All dads care that their daughter’s not out in the night climbing on a scumbag. There’s a reason why the dad-with-shotgun-meeting-first-date joke is so uproariously funny. Dads care. A lot. And in their own special ways.

But these dads at the purity ball don’t have shotguns, and aren’t meeting their daughter’s first date. The dudes in the video have swords – literally – and are creating fear in their daughters that if they give in to their human urges, it will destroy the father-daughter bond, piss off Jesus, and put a vagina-shaped shame on the family.

So, you’re still saying, “yeah, but c’mon dude, all that virginity and family stuff is normal.” And then I’m all like…

Annnnnd here’s where we remember that fathers are terribly important and can use their power for good…or…well…for other things.